Raising children is difficult, time consuming, challenging–just plain HARD. There is a saying that if I knew how much fun it was to be a grandma, I would have done that first. If only. . . .
I am now on my fourth grandchild and with each one I have learned so much about grandparenting.
I hope to share experiences, ideas, tips, websites, books, stories, and wisdom to bring new and experienced grandmas more joy and less responsibility and hope that anyone reading this blog will share your experiences, ideas, tips, websites, books, stories and wisdom to bring to me, and other new or experienced grandmas more joy and less responsibility.
We are the baby boomers who put our hearts and souls into raising our beautiful and brilliant and successful children. We were responsible parents. We reaped joy from our children and continue to do so; however, being parents forever, our adult children still come with responsibility. Our grandchildren, however, are our children’s responsibility. Our job is to solely reap joy from our grandchildren and pass along the responsibility to our children. So, I guess this blog will necessarily talk about our continued responsibility to our children so we can reap pure joy from our grandchildren. We can make a difference!
But that gets me ahead of myself. GREAT Grandparenting starts with the first news of the pregnancy!
FIRST GREAT TIP: Every time you share that you are going to be a grandma, and I promise you that you will share often, if the other person has grandchildren, ask for a grandma lesson. Ask what is that special thing that they do with or for their grandchildren? What piece of advice can they give you? I was fortunate that I was at a huge 1000 person conference right after I learned I was going to be a grandma. There were lots of baby boomer grandparents there. I went up to every one I saw, male and female, and asked him or her to give me a piece of advice. I soaked it all in. Pure joy was coming. Near the end of the conference, I bumped into an old schoolmate who had her nine year old twins with her. I “borrowed’ her twins and told them everything I had learned at the conference about being a grandma and asked if it was good advice. They responded: “Can you be our grandma?!” I knew I had hit the jackpot. The joy I have had these last nine years has proven that grandma lessons work.
So back to: GREAT Grandparenting starts with the first news of the pregnancy!
The best thing you can do is make sure the parents to be are healthy and happy and relaxed and secure.
The pregnant pair are overjoyed but scared to death. DO NOT share the stories of your childbirth(s) even if it was an easy delivery! Too soon. Too much information.
Too much information is the key here. Keep it to yourself. Share your pregnancy and childbirth experiences with your friends. Remember and share with them. Do not remember and share with the pregnant pair at the beginning of the pregnancy.
Instead: SECOND GREAT TIP: Buy them books and hook them into the web.
For the expectant mother: The best book for the anal pregnant mother-to be: Your Pregnancy Week by Week. 7th Edition is out December 2011. If you are a Barnes and Noble Discount card holder you can preorder: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/your-pregnancy-week-by-week-7th-edition-glade-b-curtis/1101001918?ean=9780738214641&itm=6&usri=your%2bpregnancy%2bweek%2bby%2bweek
Second best book: What to Expect When you are Expecting. This only does monthly updates and when you are pregnant you went more than monthly, but if you are one who just has to buy two books, this is the second best.
Best website: The pregnant one can put in her due date and they will send weekly updates on the pregnancy and even after the baby is born.http://www.babycenter.com/memberbenefits/index.htm?v=pregnancy_mag&scid=GOO:BCSITE:preg&ef_id=GWBN5YQ@Tm8AAMfm:20110917202111:s
THIRD GREAT TIP: Now that you have hooked them up with the best website, ask them to please forward you the information from the website each week. You read it too. NOW you can share and talk about THAT WEEK only and only GOOD things–not the nightmares of you finding blood in your underpants that week during your pregnancy. But, if that happens to them, you can point out ONLY THEN that that happened to you and they (or the other parent to be) survived and are here to hear the tale. And recommend they call their OB’s office. If you have no clue, recommend they call their OB’s office. It’s okay, OBs know pregnant pairs will call often. Do research on the web if that is your thing–but remember–do not give too much information. You are now connected to hear what is happening each week with your grandchild to be. You are sharing their joy. Pure Grandma joy.
For the expectant father: The best book for the anal father-to be: The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips and Ideas for the Dad to Be. http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/the-expectant-father-facts-tips-and-advice?store=book&keyword=the+expectant+father+facts+tips+and+advice
For the expectant father with a short attention span and/or if you are one who just has to buy two books, this is the second best: A book that is funny and entertaining and short: My Boys can Swim!: The Guy’s Official Guide to Pregnancy. http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/my-boys-can-swim-the-official-guy’s-guide-to?store=book&keyword=my+boys+can+swim+the+official+guy%27s+guide+to
FOURTH GREAT TIP: Read the books too. Things have changed. Boy, have things changed. Yes, some old time tips are still the best. But knowing what they know now is important. Talk about the books. You are now connected to discuss information about your grandchild to be. You are sharing their joy. Pure Grandma joy.
MORE COMING ABOUT: The best thing you can do is make sure the parents to be are healthy and happy and relaxed and secure.
UNTIL NEXT TIME:
JOY,
GRANDMA
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