Grandma Bonding with Grandchild With Jokes

Jokes for kidsWhen my grandson turned five, he learned what a joke was.  Of course, it was a great way to stay on the telephone with a five year old, so I immediately looked for children’s books containing jokes.  I bought two of the same book, one to keep at our house and one to keep at his house.  National Geographic has a wonderful joke book for children, called “Just Joking,” for $7.15.  Joke Books for Kids even has a link which lists all the bestselling children’s joke books with different kinds of riddles, knock-knock jokes and more. Joke books on Kindle

We went to Barnes & Noble together and picked out some more joke books that he liked.  We had fun with the books, but some of the jokes were just beyond a five year old’s ability to comprehend.  So I created my own list!  I used this list to share jokes on the telephone.  I used this list to email a joke to my grandson.  Here is Grandma’s list of best jokes for a grandchild who discovers jokes or for Grandma to introduce a grandchild to jokes:

Why didn’t the man die when he drank the poison?

Because he was in the living room!


Why did the toilet paper go down the hill?

It wanted to get to the bottom.


What is a mouse’s favorite food?

Mice cream.


What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?



What do you get when you cross a cat and a lemon tree?

A sourpuss!


Why did the tree cross the road?

He had to leaf!


Why did the banana go to the doctor?

Because he wasn’t peeling well.


Why did the star go to the bathroom?

It had to twinkle.


What occurs once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a hour?

The letter M.


Why was it hot after the baseball game?

Because all the fans had gone.


Why did the little boy eat caterpillars?

Because he wanted to spit out butterflies!


What do you call a pig that does karate?

Pork chop!


What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?

“You’re too young to smoke.”


Why was the math book sad?

Because it had too many problems!


What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.


Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.


Why was Tigger looking in the toilet?

He was looking for Pooh!


What did the baseball mitt say to the baseball?

“Catch you later!”


How did the man walk in the rain without getting his hair wet?

He was bald!


What is the difference between broccoli and boogers?

Kids don’t eat broccoli!


What did one eye say to the other?

“Just between you and me something smells.”


Why did the orange quit the race?

Because he ran out of juice.


Where do you hear voices when there is nobody around?

On the telephone!


What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Everyone can roast beef but no one can pea soup!


Knock, knock

Who’s there?


Spell who?



Knock, knock

Who’s there?


Beets who?

Beets me!


What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean?

Nothing, it just waved.


Why is an elephant so wrinkly?

Because they are too hard to iron.


When does Lady Gaga get mad?

When you Poker Face!


What is the most delicious snake?

A PIEthon!


If you drop a red hat into the blue sea what does it become?


You can use Grandma’s favorites to start a riddle dialogue with your grandchild.  There is so much fun in learning riddles.  Grandma and grandchild can create their own riddle book with their favorites.  This activity becomes a bonding experience with a grandchild beginning to learn  reading and comprehension.  Such fun and



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