Why this Long Distance Grandma No Longer Envies Local Grandmas

Kids laughingAll of our grandchildren have been here for spring break for a week.  Today, Grandpa turned to me and said, “I think we need to repaint after the grandchildren leave.”  One week of riding toys and grandchildren banging against the walls and it shows.  With regard to grandchildren banging against the walls, this is true.  Our two year old grandson has a line of bumps and bruises across his nose and the center of his face.   He was holding on to his father’s leg and landed against the wall.  I must admit, though, that he looks worse than the wall!

As soon as Grandpa said we needed to repaint, the phone rang.  It was one of my best grandma friends who is a local grandma.  She has the privilege of having her grandchildren with her weekly.  My Grandma friend is the best grandma I know.  She is child centric and grandchildren centric, putting the needs of them before hers.  She has always been the caretaker of everyone.  If there is an event involving her children or grandchildren, she is there.  I told her we were going to have to repaint, and she said that is nothing, she has to touch up her walls and baseboards every three months!  I told her she just made me feel better that I am a long distance grandmother.  I asked her top three reasons why I should not be unhappy as a long distance grandmother.  Here are her top three:

  1. Constant wear and tear on her house.  She said I have one week of riding toys and grandchildren banging against the walls and she has it every week.  My grandma friend said she is constantly cleaning and repairing and fixing and doing.
  2. Going to the grocery store very often.  Yes, I know from this spring break week.  Publix and I are great friends as I went to the super market every day this week.  We went through dozens of eggs,  mounds of fruit,  more loaves of bread, and of course more snacks and cookies than I can count.  Imagine, my grandma friend does this every week!
  3. Toys and equipment out constantly.   My grandma friend says her home has all of the baby and child equipment and toys handy and out at all times.  Wow!  This does it.  After everyone leaves, we bring the riding toys, the high chair, the booster seat, the strollers, the car seats, and all other larger equipment to the storage facility.  Yes, we had to rent a storage facility for everything for the grandchildren.  This Grandma has a philosophy.  If you make it easy for the parents of your long distance grandchildren by having everything they need for them at their fingertips at your home, they will come often.  I ask for a shopping list of current diaper sizes and current food choices, even down to current sun screen choices and have everything they need in baskets for each child.  But, once everyone leaves, everything goes away.

Yes, I am compulsive and organized but on a mission to have my grandchildren with me often.  But, I now realize often is wonderful and great.  Our two year old grandson said, “HI, Mema,” and ran into my arms as soon as he saw me.  He knows who I am and gives me hugs and kisses even though he does not see me every week.  Yes, I try to see him every six weeks at least at his age, but it is working to establish the intimate and close relationship this Grandma wants with her grandchildren.

My great friend who I consider the best grandma did not mention the wear and tear on HER as one of her top three.  Hummm.  I think when she reads this blog post, grandma wear and tear might be one of her top three.  When the two year old comes walking out of the bedroom at 6:19 am, I am up and usually asleep when he goes to sleep.  I am exhausted.

So I guess each one of us should just count our blessings for what we have.  The grass is not greener.  Everyone’s joy is different and it does not make for less

Joy,

Mema

 

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